Maybe I don't hate oatmeal.

 

 

I have always hated oatmeal, but I made the Padula-meets-Gaiman version this morning, and I must say, it was YUM! I toasted whole oats in a dab of butter, then added fresh milk (from Woven Meadows Farm) a half cup at a time until they absorbed as much as they could--risotto-style--then finished it with a little brown sugar and vanilla (to taste). To serve, you add a blob of your favorite jam and a good splodge of fresh cream. What's that? You say you don't have farm-fresh cream? Well, it sucks to be you, and you should probably reevaluate your priorities and start living right!

Update: Ok, now I've done it. Instead of plain oats, I took a five-grain blend from Bob's Red Mill and prepared it Padula/risotto-style with farm-fresh milk, cooking until tender. When the porridge was almost done, I threw in some chopped Honey Crisp apple. Before serving, I swirled in a spoonful of Biscoff (speculoos) spread and garnished it with some toasted almond slices and the requisite splodge of cream. My roommate Cyd declared it "the best thing she's ever eaten."